Tired of unreliable friends, needy pets, and therapists who charge you just to nod and ask, “And how does that make you feel?” Enter the Emotional Support Brick the only companion that asks for nothing and gives you everything (except advice, because it’s a brick). No drama, no small talk, no judgment just pure, unshakable support in its most literal form. Hug it, talk to it, use it as a paperweight for your emotional baggage. It won’t solve your problems, but it also won’t make them worse. And let’s be honest that’s already a step up from most of your relationships.